


I won't say I'm in love till death do us apart

by leevee



Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, F/M, Marco's Musing, Spoilers - The Battle For Mewni, mention of jarco
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 13:44:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12060201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leevee/pseuds/leevee
Summary: In which Marco thought of an alternate outcome.





	I won't say I'm in love till death do us apart

**Author's Note:**

> Star vs The Forces of Evil is created by Daron Nefcy  
> An alternate reality by leevee  
> The author does not take any financial profit from this story
> 
> Originally for 30 Days of Literature 2017 - Day 10: _till death do us apart_.

it started out as a simple feeling; whenever she was around, you would either feel pumped to jump into some interdimensional adventure or just to relax and happily bounce in the the Bounce Lounge, and you called it a comfortable feeling.

and then Toffee appeared, that bastard lizard was apparently able to regrew the way starfishes do with their decapitated hands thus fear took control, but Star, your brightest Star was too courageous to the point she decided to erase magic just for you; people called it heroic but deep down you wonder if a peasant like you even deserved such sacrifice from a crown princess; insecurities set in and you felt helpless.

still, she befriended you and you were still her best friend who taught her the ways of the earth, she respected you and like you for being you, and you are okay; she even supported you in pursuing your childhood sweetheart, the cool Jackie, doing the extra mile just to make sure the three of you would be able to hang out without neglecting the third wheel.

after that, Song Day happened and you would like to declare it as the Wreck Day, the day when the comfortable feeling you had befriended with was gone, the comfortable mixed with a small insecurities feeling that might have grown into something else had magically turned into massive insecurities with little hints of past comfort and you are definitely not okay; you had been accustomed to the not-so-content ambience you experienced together with Star and Song Day had ripped that precious treasure from you.

you strived to get that back ("I don't have a crush on you") yet at the same day you were left behind with stains of tears, a dissolving guest room, and the biggest confession of this summer ("I do have a crush on you!") but you were too confused, too disoriented that you missed the chance to grab her delicate finger so that she could stay.

this is the breaking point: you finally realized that this comfort you had been feeling was not only consisted of friendship; it was the feeling that you have found the one you would gladly spend your eternity with, the one who completes you, and yet you lost her.

one question before you chased her: do you deserve her, though? do you deserve her, after all the great saves she had done to you, after all the heart-wrenching situation you had put her into when you were blinded by your stupid crush towards Jackie?

your parents and your girlfriend kept saying yes (maybe out of pity) and you jumped into another interdimensional adventure, this time by yourself--

\--and you found her, in a jail, in a chaotic palace that once belonged to Butterfly family, (and most importantly) in her warm embrace once more, returning all the comfortable feeling you once had for her; this time the feeling resonated even further into your being since it really filled the void you had from Star leaving you behind, because for the first time after that night you feel okay.

your heart found another name for this feeling, a better name suiting such wonderful feeling but your mind would not acknowledge it yet (wait until everything is okay in Mewni, you are patient enough to wait until Star is no longer messed up) but you would say it out loud soon, pretty soon.

the next thing you know, she's dead. sacrificing herself (again), erasing magic, without any indestructable aquarium to protect her from the blast.

the content feeling you experienced mere seconds ago was replaced with every evil you could think off; and you howled of anger and sadness as you direct your rage towards the being who destroyed everything: Toffee must die toffeemustdietoffeemust--

at the end of the day, it has always been your fault, though, for not saying anything until it was too late.

you love her.

she was the past, but your unsaid feeling belongs to the present; you love her.

and your regret goes on forever.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry if you guys feel uncomfortable with my style of writing. This is one of the style I usually used in writing poetry, in which one paragraph does not contain any full stop and besides of names and the word _I_ there would not be any capital letters.
> 
> I imagined what would happened to starco if Star really dies from events in Battle For Mewni, and this is Marco's musing. Hope you guys like it!
> 
> In case you do, please check my Instagram account for more poems: [@leevee.writes](https://instagram.com/leevee.writes)!


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